How Negative Internal Dialogue Affects Your Body

negative internal dialogue

How Negative Internal Dialogue Affects Your Body

I’ve hurt my back three times. The first time after my 85 ton son was born. (Big baby.) The second time was after my daughter was born! (I obviously don’t know how to pick up heavy babies.) Then a third time when starting a pilates class. I literally bent my legs and lifted my arms then boom, back totally out. I couldn’t walk or stand up straight and was miserable for days. I’ve even had a couple scares since then but now I feel totally different. I can’t imagine that happening again because I am aware of my own destructive and negative internal dialogue. I have learned how to minimize stress and anxiety while creating self love through my self talk.

When thinking about it, I realized my internal dialogue went something like this: “I need to do this, I should be doing this, I haven’t done this.” By talking to myself this way, I was causing anxiety, stress and eventually physical pain, that caused me to not only slow down but ask, “Why is my back hurting again?” 

I believe pain is a physical warning of the emotional trajectory you are on. Pain is a signal to you, that this emotional pattern is dangerous for your health.

When you have a negative internal dialogue, you can cause physical pain in your body.

You can’t feel emotionally distressed and not cause some form of physical manifestation.

[ctt_hbox link=”8r4xD” via=”no” ]Anger, for just one minute, uses enough of your resources to suppress the immune system for 4-6 hours.[/ctt_hbox]

What about Stress? Depression? Anxiety? These negative inner thoughts are taking up all the space of your inner dialogue. So what exactly do your emotions do to your body? How do they affect your body? Being in physical pain generally causes you to slow down. I began to focus on wellness, while honestly searching for the meaning. Not searching for what is wrong with me physically, but what emotion is causing thisMost people will ask, “what’s wrong?” Do I have a slipped disk or did I pull a muscle? Did I hurt myself picking something up?

Do you ever ask yourself the question “What’s wrong with me?” because I believe there is never anything wrong with you.

Some better questions to ask are: 

  1. What does this mean?
  2. Is there something my body trying to tell me?
  3. Do I need to change something?

How I started changing my internal dialogue:

I decided to let go of all the things I think I needed to do but didn’t have time for. I started focusing on wellness and happiness, to let my body and mind heal. This didn’t mean I didn’t go to work or feed my children. Rather, I stopped this incessant negative self talk in my head.

Pain is a pattern interruption which can provide clarity when you need it most. Your body is intelligent enough to let you know when you are off balance. It wasn’t actually all things I wanted to do that caused the pain, but it was my internal dialogue

Examples of my negative internal dialogue:

“I need to write the book right now. Why haven’t I already started? There isn’t enough time to do everything I want. I need to launch my course and I should be doing webinars already. There is too much to do with 2 kids, a husband, 2 businesses, 2 dogs and a home to care for – that I don’t have the time to do the creative work I want to do.”

Even writing this exhausts me! And that’s not all folks. I seriously needed and really wanted to paint my dark and outdated home and office after 10 years, but of course that would be more time away from what I “should” be doing.

I started meditating to improve my thoughts.

Through meditation, prayer and quiet reflection, I took the time to ask the questions: 

  1. “Is there anything that would make me really happy and content right now?”
  2. “What will make the most difference in how I feel?”
  3. “Can I let go of whatever is causing pressure?”

I asked myself, “If I never write a book, will I still be happy?

The answer was yes. I don’t ever have to DO anything and I can still be happy. This was the clarity I needed to let go of my negative inner dialogue. This was a breakthrough.

You will never be happy when you get to a destination. You have to become happy right now, that is how you get there. 

I changed negative internal dialogue by focusing on the present moment. The past no longer exists. The future is just another now and it’s not even here yet. Nothing is real except the present moment.

[ctt_hbox link=”bgNZ6″ ]Accessing the feeling of happiness that we think we’ll feel when we “do something” is the secret to getting there.[/ctt_hbox]

What I really needed to do was just BE. Be with my kids, be with my husband, be happy in everything I’m doing right now. This included painting my entire house to bring more light and happiness into our lives (which is in process as I write this.) I cannot begin to tell you the peace and joy this gives me. Just like me, my house has made a complete transformation from gloomy and dark to vibrant and light. 

By focusing on right now, not the future, I’m taking an incredible amount of pressure and stress away. I realized that: writing a book, launching a course, building my brand or DO-ing anything, would not truly make me happy.

I actually needed to be happy right now in order to get there. All I needed to relieve the pressure was a detailed plan with a clear vision of what exactly I wanted to accomplish and by when. Next was taking action to start now. Then it would be easy to fit it in as I was prioritizing what was really important, not only my goals, but my family. 

I felt like I had a breakthrough with my inner thoughts.

I felt a surge of exhilaration, inspiration and creativity. Then I realized that this experience was the place the book would come from. What I am going through is part of the lessons. I will teach from experience, in the first book, a spiritual teaching memoir.

Wow! [ctt_hbox link=”MmFfJ” ]Just let go and you will allow the space for inspiration to enter.[/ctt_hbox]

Remember, there is no place you need to get to, right now is all that matters.

All YOU NEED to BE is happy and let your emotions guide you to the next step. 

I will write my book as I am inspired to do it, or I will never write a book, either way I am deciding to be happy right now, not in the future, but right now.

  • Keep thinking you should end a relationship, what are you waiting for?
  • Know you need to spend more time with your children, do it now.
  • Thinking you should look for work that you love, then do it.
  • Want to write a book? Create a plan and schedule to start writing consistently.

The key? Start NOW.

Stop focusing on what you are NOT doing.

The pressure you put on yourself for what we are NOT doing is why your body gives you a signal to pay attention. You must let go of having to “do” and remove the negative internal nagging that is solely in your head. This will free you.

When you let go and surrender, you are always guided. That is when inspiration will carry you. The Universe will deliver everything you need: the people, the places the things, in just the right order and at the right time…

To learn more, get 3 ways to stop pain here.

Ready for your internal dialogue breakthrough? 

As a professional life coach, I will give you the guidance, support and accountability you need to create the life of your dreams. Everyone can benefit from coaching in not only their personal life, but also in business.

Create your own breakthrough with monthly ongoing coaching. This includes 2 Zoom face to face meetings and email access twice monthly or for more affordable growth, start with my next group coaching session.

I look forward to working with you.

I am grateful even for the pain, it is the best teacher I know,