After Death Communication – Asking for a Sign

asking for a sign

I’ve always wanted to know if after death communication was real.

I mean can you get a physical sign that your loved one is around you if you need them? Up until now, I hadn’t lost someone so close that I felt like their spirit was trying to communicate with me. So I’ve really never tried. My mom is a different story since we were so close.

We have all felt my mom’s presence. My brother went to church shortly after she died and said he felt like she was sitting beside him. He had her bible and it was marked, in exactly the same place of the sermon that day. Coincidence? I don’t think so. Every time I go to her house, I find messages, journals, books and items I know she left for me and is guiding me to.

Recently, my father suggested the immediate family take a trip together to honor my mom and spend some time together to heal. Of course we all said yes and spent a long weekend bonding at the beach. It was so much fun taking hour-long walks with my sister and doing karaoke with my dad and brothers. The days were long and full of conversation, children playing, eating and swimming.

We won’t talk about the jello shots. That was a first, since most of us don’t drink. 🙂

Why did we wait until there was a death in the family to spend quality time together?

I thought, when was the last time we had all been together for a whole weekend or even for dinner? I couldn’t remember since two of my siblings weren’t even talking.

As my dad was singing a song dedicated to my mom, I cried and felt she was with us. I know the tears were also because, I just kept thinking, I hope this is not the last time I hear my dad sing. 

You could see the joy beaming from his face, as someone he didn’t know at the karaoke bar recorded his singing. The best part was, when the whole room yelled in appreciation of his voice, which happens to sound exactly like Elvis…well sometimes.

How wonderful, for my dad to finally get out again and have some fun. After all, he had been taking care of my mom for years. The simplest act – like singing, can be extremely healing if it brings you joy. I’m sure the single women doting on him didn’t hurt either.

I knew my mom was smiling, knowing my dad was still a flirt while wearing his wedding band AND she had singlehandedly brought the family back together. My siblings had put their disagreements aside to honor her memory, while creating new ones. I even overheard the words “I’m sorry.” So refreshing.

It was magical to watch, as everyone made the decision to forgive and be present. We already decided to make this a yearly event and have been deepening our bond as a family. This is pretty easy since we are all on a group text which keeps me laughing. My dad is consistently a couple days behind the rest of us with his responses, haha.

How to get a sign from someone who has passed

Charles, James, Laura and Crystal- Youngest to Oldest

This is why I like to spend money on experiences, more than things.

I have beautiful memories of playing hot potato in the pool with a water ball and all the children. I convinced my sister to jump in the cold water with me and to take off her hat and get her hair wet. All I had to say is “Where is your spirit?” and she caved, ha!

Be a child, have fun, move your body and you will return to your natural state of joy.

What a wonderful way to heal the pain of loss. We laughed as we swam, threw water at each other and lived in the moment. These are memories I will cherish forever. Who knows how long any of us will be here.

Don’t ever save anything for a special occasion. Being alive IS the special occasion.

As we each took our turns sobbing and comforting each other, I felt the reassurance of knowing I could communicate with her even after death. I don’t think anyone else really felt the serenity of knowing her spirit had not died, only her human body. To prove my point I would need some proof.

Is there Communication After Death?

Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross was asked in Body, Mind & Spirit magazine if we can communicate with loved ones who have gone on?

She replied: “Yes, if you are ready and if you are at a high enough spiritual level. It can be done through dreams and also through other methods. I always tell bereaved parents, after they have given up their heaviness and resentment, to say, ‘I really need to see you in my dreams. I need to know that you’re okay.’ If there is a lot of sadness and anger, the one who has gone on cannot come through. But if the conditions are right and there is enough faith, the contact will occur.”

The key here is you must ASK your loved one to visit you in your dreams or give you a sign.

You can also ask God, Spirit or your higher power to help you.  It is much easier for someone who has transitioned to come to you when you are relaxed, open and receptive – like in a meditative state or asleep.

These dreaming “visits” are much more vivid, intense, colorful, and real than ordinary dreams.

You may also ask that a “sign” to be given to you when you are awake, to let you know that your loved one still exists. If you are patient, and if you are observant, you will receive one or more signs — for me both were within 24 hours. The most common signs are butterflies and rainbows. Others include birds, animals, flowers, and a large variety of inanimate objects – such as coins or whatever item you associate with your loved one or they have shown you.

If you can learn how to meditate, this will increase your sensitivity and awareness.

Many bereaved people are contacted by their loved ones during meditation and prayer – you may see them in your mind’s eye and even have a two-way conversation. However, do not expect to receive messages when you are meditating. If you attempting to do anything besides quieting yourself, then you are not meditating.

While meditating during a trip, my husband’s aunt who had recently passed away “whispered” in my ear, “Tell Allen I love him when you see him.” I was on my way to Seattle and would see him that weekend. I couldn’t believe how loud it was and how much it startled me that I opened my eyes immediately and gasped.

It was as if she was standing there on my left side whispering in my left ear. It was so lovely to give him her message. We both knew it was her and I could see her laugh with delight in my mind’s eye as I told him what I heard her say. As I have grown more spiritual, the more sensitive I have become regarding my intuition and the spirit world. I am not a medium, though I am starting to wonder. I don’t see dead people but I definitely hear voices!

I decided to dedicate a meditation to asking my mom for a physical sign. I knew she was around me when I asked her to be. I could always hear her responding to me in my head, but I am a human having a physical experience, and I want a physical sign!!

While deeply meditating I thought about my mom, the way she smelled, the lines on her face, the color of her eyes, and asked her to come and be with me. As I continued deep breathing, in a meditative state, I began feeling my mom’s presence in front of me, I felt goose bumps from head to toe. Like a wave of warm reassurance.

Once you feel their presence, ask for a physical sign.

The first thing I saw in my mind’s eye was a yellow rose when I asked for a sign.

The way this meditation works is, you should see this sign, whatever you envisioned, within around 24 hours. Since I work from home, I was wondering how in the world I would see a yellow rose somewhere?

But, I went along with my day and totally forgot about it. The next day I was about to go to Yoga when I had an overwhelming feeling to take a run in the neighborhood instead. As I was making my first lap, I thought to myself how it had almost been 24 hours and wondered if I would see a yellow rose?

Just then, I was stopped in my tracks, as two bushes of yellow roses were to my left. I immediately burst into tears of joy, as I took in a huge gasp. I have lived in this neighborhood for 7 years and never, ever, have I seen yellow roses. What is most encouraging is yellow was my mother’s favorite color. I was so happy and overjoyed to know my mother is still a thought away, when I need to feel her presence.

How to get a sign from someone who has passed

Yellow Roses

I couldn’t stop thinking about how amazing that confirmation was, that I did it again.

I did it just to be sure it wasn’t accidental. This time I saw a ruby red slipper, obviously it was a Wizard of Oz reference, as this was one of my mom’s favorite movies.

Again, the next day I was cleaning and my daughter decided she was going to organize the kid cups. Now, this just means she is going to pull them all out and I will put them away. 🙂 As I was putting them away, one by one, I didn’t look at any of them with any particular detail, except one.

As I turned it around, there was a giant red shoe covering the glass. In no way did I remember that we owned a Wizard of Oz cup with a giant red shoe on it that read “You’ve always had the power.” I had an intense desire to turn that glass around and look at it, the only one I felt the need to do this. I laughed and smiled and said “thank you, mom.”

How to get a sign from someone who has passed

You’ve Always Had The Power

How sweet and amazing to be able to know that my mother was communicating with me after death.

I dream of her often. Even last night, as she was walking around in my dream, I knew she was dead but somehow it didn’t bother her. Like it was completely normal to hang around your loved ones as a dead body. I kept saying, “You can’t be here, you died.” This is a projection of how I view her as I’ve also seen her luminescent with light shimmery skin that was glowing. Right before I woke up, she said, “You would be amazed at what I know now.” WOW. So vivid it haunted me all day.

When we die, life isn’t over, it isn’t something to be scared of, it’s just the next step. You get to leave all your resistance, all your pain, all the uneasy and unfinished parts to become more, to regain your connection to that greater part of you that still resides with your source and return to spirit. Gone from earth, but not gone altogether. They are but a whisper away.

I think the best thing you can do for someone who is ready to transition, but having a hard time letting go, is to assure them that all is well. Everything is really ok, their spirit will not die, it is not over, it’s just the next step and it will be a beautiful journey across the rainbow bridge.

I am not afraid to die, I am afraid of not living.

Afraid of being sad too much, afraid of holding resentment and anger, afraid of not growing, afraid of not loving enough, listening enough and not creating enough memories. I always encourage people who have lost the ones they love to still talk to them, even if just in your head. All you need to do to quiet your mind is ask and they will be right there. Whether you can feel or hear them depends on your level of faith and spirituality.

I look for the signs because I know they are there. She’s the whisper of the leaves on the trees as I jog in the neighborhood. She’s the smell of the yellow roses she guided me to. She’s the music of the wind chimes when there is no wind. She is the arm wrapped around me when I’m not feeling well, the goosebumps I feel for no reason and the sounds the birds make when they wake me in the morning. She’s the red cardinal I always see when I look out the window.

There are good days and there are bad days when you are mourning a fresh loss, but there are many more good when you appreciate everything around you.

Look for the signs, they are there.

Here’s to yellow roses and red shoes,


Please share your stories of connecting with your loved ones in the comments. I love having your wisdom in this bright and loving community. You have a voice, please share it.

Want to try out a meditation for connecting with your loved ones who have passed? When you subscribe you’ll get a free meditation for Reconnecting with a Lost Loved One and Asking for a Sign as well as an Abundance Meditation and a 30 minute audio training, 7 Simple Steps to Create a Life You Love when you become an Art of You Insider for free.


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