4 Ways to be more Positive Around Negative People
A long time ago, our survival depended upon our ability to look out for and avoid negative situations like lions, tigers and bears (oh my!) How can you look for the positive when your brain is hardwired to look for the negative and remember it, in order to keep you safe?? You are much more likely to notice what’s wrong, than what’s right by default. So there you go, it’s not really YOUR fault! Whew! #prehistoricbrain
Nowadays, we don’t need the heightened fear response; yet many of us hold onto it anyway.
Most of what we worry about will not actually happen, we’re just suffering in advance by feeling anxious, upset or uptight.
The good news is you can train your brain to become more positive and overcome negative people, situations and even your worst enemy, your own thoughts.
Your thoughts create your feelings, not people.
You cannot change all of the people you have to spend time with, especially if you work with them, but you have complete control over your thoughts.
Most often you are just blaming something outside of yourself for why you have chosen to feel a certain way.
Similar to being upset at the grocery store line, you blame how you feel on the lady who needed a “price check on aisle 4.” You are frustrated at having to wait too long, so that ruins your experience and it’s the lady’s fault or is it?
Your interpretation is creating the way you feel, which is only perceived. That does not make it true. However if perception is the only reality, then YOU create your truth. What is true for you certainly may not be true for another.
Have you ever felt unloved, jealousy or envy and then realized later the person you felt this towards was actually gentle, loving and kind?
You projected this false truth and so you experienced, what you imagined to be true.
You are creating your experiences, which determines how your relationships feel to you.
This is your truth and yours alone.
You can change what you are creating: whether it is a negative relationship, stress at work or internal negativity (through your own self talk) by just stopping all the imagining.
Mindfulness and awareness in the present moment will stop your negative thoughts and your imagination from making up scenarios that aren’t true.
Presence will give you a moment to appreciate what is true.
Hate cannot exist where love is present.
You cannot feel negative when you are appreciating.
You can train your brain to rewire itself just by consciously paying attention to things that give you joy throughout your day.
If your thoughts are making you unhappy, it will help you to be present and aware of what you are doing. Then you can take back control of your brain and your thoughts and soothe your nervous system into believing you are out of danger.
Your mind can be your worst enemy but it can also be your best friend.
You have to choose when you listen and when you get out of your head.
You will know when to leave the mind and ego that is controlling you because you will feel negative emotion.
Step outside your mind and into the present moment with conscious awareness.
Notice every little detail around you, colors, sounds, temperature, voices, animals and textures.
Your awareness through breathing in the present moment will leave the negative mind buried and through appreciation of the beauty around you, it will begin to dissolve.
The more you practice mindfulness, the negative mind will disappear. You are soothing your unconscious brain into believing that you are safe, there is no imminent danger and no evil wicked witch in the haunted forest.
When you feel the negativity and worry creeping up again, you can silence those stories and creations with your presence in the now, the most powerful place to be happy, is right here, right now, in the present moment where you are safe and so very loved.
Leave me a comment because I’d love to know:
1. What can you do now, to stop letting what other people do affect you? Other than not give a f%#k? 🙂
2. How can you create more self-love and less negative self-talk?
Leave a comment below and let me know.
With love and appreciation,
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